Its a new year and what will it bring

Originally posted 2015-01-07 00:57:18.

Well its now 2015, Yay! What that means, who knows. Will it be a good year for us and so many more, one could hope so. To start off the new year a very close family friend’s husband of 28 years passed away. He had been suffering from ALS. He passed on January 2, 2015. His wife is such an overwhelmingly loving person who we were honored to connect with back in 2009 when Dusty was going through a time when he had a tumor/cyst in between his brain and ear. It is called a cholesteatoma. We were selling items to raise the money to help us with the costs of going back and forth to the doctors, hospitals during that time. She purchased a few things from us even though she was thousands of miles away and didn’t know us from a hole in the head. We haven’t lost contact since then. To this day we have still not met each other face to face. I vow to make this year that year that we finally meet face to face.

I hope this year we can get these unfinished items marked off our checklist. James has an appointment at the VA clinic, Finally. But nothing has been done as far as his claim. We did put in a request for financial hardship but as of today I see no changes when I look at his claim status online. Granted I have heard that the status isn’t always up to date. I guess we will get somewhere once he is finally seen but what that actually does for his claim I am not sure. It’s almost like starting at the beginning because he was never given a rating at all when he separated from the Marine Corps and to my understanding he should have gotten some type of rating for the injuries he sustained while in the Marine Corps. But…like everything else he wasn’t given a rating. I don’t know if all of this is a blessing in disguise or a disaster in the making. The more time that passes and he has to keep dealing with the injuries the way they are without relief well it just makes for an even bigger problem. With his tailbone injury seeming to get worse by the looks of things I wonder what options there are for him. He doesn’t have to sit very long before its starts to hurt him. I think that is part of the reason why he prefers riding the motorcycle than the vehicle. But on days like are ahead for our region, I am not sure he will want to ride the motorcycle, the temps are said to be only in the 20’s for the high and that doesn’t include the wind chills. So we will have to figure out something if that’s the case because I have my nerve conduction study appointment and definitely need to go to that.

Kayla starts back at school in a few days. With nothing else raised I am not sure what will happen. I am hoping and praying they will still allow her to come back and continue on with second semester. If anyone has any suggestions as to any other grants, foundations, etc that she falls into a category for funds please let me know. I really would like to not have to worry about this right now but like every other aspect of our lives it is always something. Don’t get me wrong, we could be in more dire situations than we are now but with all we have gone through, where we have gone, to where we have come, I truly hope for that light at the end of the tunnel.

Its funny because I spoke to someone today. He was here for other reasons but just happened to speak on bits and pieces of our lives. He stated he felt as if my purpose in this life hasn’t been revealed (just not in those words). I told him sometimes I feel as if people think I have made things up. I know there will always be non-believers no matter what the subject. That’s just apart of human nature. We all don’t agree on the same things, like the same things, so naturally our understanding of events are seen as impossible or bullshit. My intentions aren’t to deceive anyone or to gain anything.
No matter what, I know in my heart what I am doing and why I am doing it and as long as my friends and family are good then I am good. We live our lives the way we choose to, with the morals or beliefs you were raised upon or chose to believe. No one’s life is perfect, no one is immune from heartache, pain or anything else for that matter.

We seem to have lost things we once respected. I often wonder why people feel the way they feel about certain things. Whether they base them off their beliefs or do they base it off other reasons. We destroy things that we need and then cry about it being destroyed. For what? I read something recently that has still been on my mind.
Someone stated that “children don’t need discipline they need love” Couldn’t disciple be in different forms other that the assumed spanking, whooping, etc.? All children need some sort of discipline. Maybe I am misreading the statement but it is just been on my mind why someone would say children didn’t need disciple. We can’t let them roam free and run all over the place, running over the parents and others. I honestly would like to know if what was stated is exactly what was meant. Am I wrong in thinking this?

On another note, I took Dusty to see a doctor recently and I was addressing my concerns about his weight loss. She told me if he is hungry just let him eat. I told her I wondered if he was really hungry or did he just want it. I told her that he could sit there and eat all day long if we let him. I know he will tell you he is hungry just to get something. He can be manipulative. Her response, “I don’t think they have the ability to do that” WHAT?! REALLY?! Did I really just hear a doctor say this? I just laughed because I know she is 100% incorrect. Either she has never really spent time with or treated someone “like Dusty” or or…I don’t know. I was floored to actually here a doctor tell me this. If you think they lack the ability to trick you into giving them something then you need to go back to school. I have seen him do it, he has done it at school many times, and still to this day will try to. I really wonder where some go to med school but then again I wonder how they passed it.

Til next time. I am going to kiss my husband and remind him I love him and I support him no matter what. While Dusty asks me once again for something to eat. I swear this boy seems to eat majority of the day.

RIP Steve Rodolff

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