Shear Disappoint

I wish I could explain the feelings going through my veins.

To have learned the things I have and to know the things weren’t as they seemed… the shear amount of disappoint is unbelievable.

Now to have to deal with all of that is beyond irritating.

There are family members that shouldn’t have to even go through this right now but yet here we are.

Then another family member is MIA and holds truths that only a few know.

I am glad my momma’s ashes weren’t spread like I had planned because of all of this.

Her soul probably isn’t at rest.

I am so insanely confused right now.

Feeling sorrow and pain to confusion and anger.

To know the things that were built up and to find that they were destroyed by the ones that helped her build it up.

I just don’t know how to explain it.

We now have to wait until all legal matters are handled to try and get some resemblance of normalcy back into our lives.

But also know that that sense of normalcy will never be the same.

Then to have folks try and disrespect my mother’s homestead and try and steal from the home while we haven’t even laid them to rest.

There is a special place in hell for them.

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