I shoulder the pain
I woke up this morning feeling lost, missing my momma.
I know my bio father wasn’t really a father to me but losing him I feel I also lost a part of me as well. Then, to make matters worse….
I lost the man that was my “father”.
Not by death…
I guess you’d say by choice. My heart hurts because I felt betrayed. I don’t know how to get past this. I am the one carrying this and feel like I need to do it for my momma.
God I need help… I want to let this go but I don’t know how. I just want my momma’s stuff and maybe that will help me just separate it from this but then again I don’t know.
All I have known for 31 years and I can’t just let it go easily.
I have tried to be respectful. Even to the point of ignoring him but I feel like for my momma’s sake I have to deal with this.
I mean damn it.
First someone steals my momma’s car the day after her memorial and I just can’t… ughhhh FUCK!