A few nights ago I had a weird dream. For some reason I dreamt that my mother was murdered. I am not sure if it was because I had been watching some of those shows where they talk about someone was murdered and they were trying to resolve it years later or not. In my dream I went to my mothers house. I will add that I have not been to my mothers house since…
Originally posted 2020-04-24 13:34:45. My family is getting themselves and their belongings moved from halfway across the country. She dropped off my niece and some precious belongings for me to take care of while they finish with the move. Things we hold dear will never be the same.
Originally posted 2017-07-22 17:24:01. http://johnpavlovitz.com/2017/07/21/please-stop-calling-suicide-selfish/
Originally posted 2019-02-16 18:29:30. Can someone explain to me why this hurts so freaking much?! I watched the man who I share his DNA, who may not have been a father but he was my father. Then 7 months or so later have to watch my mother, the woman who brought me into this world, carried my through this world in so many different ways. Who I miss more than life itself. I want to…
It’s been 5 years momma since I watched you take your last breathe. Not a day goes by that you don’t cross my mind. I make sure to touch your urn every single day of my life. Watching you leave the earth so unjustly, with the pain of a thousand knives you left without me.So many things left unsaid, not done, that I struggle with. So many memories have dimmed in my mind as I…
Originally posted 2019-01-26 01:27:06. I woke up this morning with the song Eye In The Sky by The Alan Parsons Project on repeat in my head. I don’t know if it was my momma trying to tell me something or if it was just a coincidence. Do you ever wake up with songs in your head or out of the blue it pops in your head? Do you wonder why? I know in my heart…
Originally posted 2020-01-30 09:00:29. I can to relate to this right now. With so many things that have changed in a little time I want to remember the good times but when I do I feel like I am messing with the healing process. I know life goes on. Hell … I am haven’t even gone back to my mothers house since she passed away. I can’t. How do you get past certain things? It…
Originally posted 2020-01-10 10:48:30. THIS MOVIE HITS SO CLOSE TO HOME Have you ever see the movie, What Dreams May Come? I was scanning through the tv channels looking for a movie or show to watch this morning and came across it. I have seen it before but for some reason this morning it took a more personal meaning. I worry about my family. Not saying this is their reality I just don’t want it…
Originally posted 2020-01-03 12:45:35. How do you start healing after this? I had to walk over to the pond they went in. I thought that would have brought me some closure but it unfortunately didn’t help. I told my my bff (who is their momma) that I thought it would help me. Last time I saw them I saw all 4 kids, their momma and their daddy. Now we see them and then don’t see…
Originally posted 2019-12-30 07:38:22. Yeah, I wasn’t in a mood to try to figure out a fitting title this morning. As I sit here waiting for my pain medications to kick in I was just thinking. Though that’s hard for some of us natural blonde’s 😉 It started in 2017. My husband lost his grandmother so we went to Tampa to be with family. To celebrate her life, the matriarchal legacy. Even though I knew…