Sunday Afternoon

Yesterday we went out to find my nephew’s birthday present.

We met up with my daughter who also brought my grandbaby.

We got there and we needed to use the bathroom.

Since it was several of us we took turns. For some reason this bathroom had a limited amount of stalls.

You would have thought they would have had more than that but maybe it is a covid-19 thing.

The men’s and women’s bathrooms were in the same place.

When my son went in there my nephew went with him. Normally if it’s just us my husband will go in with him.

Well, when my nephew came out with my son he started telling us what happened while they were in the bathroom.

There were three guys that were in there and my son was being himself. As most of you know some with special needs are just a little bit slower while doing things than the rest of us. Even some of us that don’t have special needs are slower, lol.

Anyway, my nephew told us that the “guys” ( I want to use other terms but am trying to be nice ) were bullying my son, cursing at him, yelling, telling him to hurry up. This had to had gone on for a few minutes knowing how long they were in there.

Our daughter politely said something to the “guys” after they walked out. They didn’t apologize. As they got to the end of the side of the building they ran their mouths. I don’t know what they said word for word but it was for us.

Neither one of us wanted to make a scene nor did we need anything popping off because there were just too many people there along with our family. Had we done anything it could have gone south really fast.

I have never been to this place when it was like this. Nor have we ever dealt with a situation like that. Normally my husband would have dealt with it but looking at it the way we did it may have gone in a totally different direction.

All I could think about after that is what if this or what if that.

I thought had that gone south what would we have done. I thought what if they had bullied him to the point of it getting physical? They obviously didn’t see my nephew as a threat so they could have just kept on.

My husband and I discussed it afterwards and from now on he will just have to go in with him no matter what.

We try to give our son some independence and allow him to do some things alone. We never felt that he would have been bullied in a bathroom.

I have given it much thought today as it has kind of worried me. I know I have dealt with alot of crap over the years but for the most part never had to deal with someone bullying in a public bathroom with us right outside the door.

There are alot of places we go, him and I, and now I feel like I need to rethink things in the event something like this happens again.

This outlet mall is about an hour and a half away from our home so it’s not like I will be going there with him anytime soon. Much less just the two of us.

I brought this up to one of my son’s doctors today during the telehealth appointment. I wanted to address it with the doc just in case he felt like I should do anything different than we already do.

The momma bear in me wanted to do more but I also felt like if I did it may have put my niece and grandbaby in danger.

My mind just keeps going back and forth. It has almost triggered memories of past situations in some ways. Situations unlike this but I get a similar feeling if that makes sense. I don’t quite know how to put it in words.

My son is 27 years old and doesn’t exactly seem like he is 27. If he says something you can tell he isn’t but if you don’t hear him say anything you will never really know.

It has me wondering how do we teach our special needs children to protect themselves? If my son says nothing to something and they want to be an ass for no reason what can our child/adult children do?

I know my post seems to ramble so please forgive me.

If anyone has dealt with this type of situation and has any input please leave me a comment.

I am trying to get rid of this headache so I will end the post here for today.

Thanks for your ears.

1 Response

  1. March 22, 2021

    […] As a parent of an adult child with #autism we have never had to deal with bullying like what happened to us yesterday. I have had to deal with other types of bullying towards my son when he was younger but not like this. I am hoping to find someone else that may have dealt with something similar.http://www.throughourlives.com/family-2/sunday-afternoon/ […]

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: