Originally posted 2018-06-12 13:09:01. I need your prayers, miracles. My heart hurts and I just can’t do life without my momma. She is in the fight for life and I will likely not be on social media much. Her kidneys took a hit and need to heal in order for them to do any chemo or radiation. Cancer is in her liver and lungs and they need to see if it is in her brain…
Originally posted 2018-06-06 11:13:07. As I sit here looking of inspiration for each keystroke I hold back tears. The normal daily routine of getting my son up to take his medications doesn’t stop for anything. Hearing the words in my head over and over… CANCER… My mother has beaten colorectal cancer just a few years ago. Her body still trying to recover from the chemo and radiation. Then having to have her arteries bypassed…
Originally posted 2020-03-20 21:26:45. There are words in my heart and mind that are desperately trying to get out. The news I learned today was supposed to be an extremely joyous one, truth is, it’s not. I suddenly felt this overwhelming feeling come over me, a feeling I can’t explain. It was sadness, grief, anger, and desperation. I feel so lost.I don’t know what to do… 😪😪😪
Originally posted 2019-02-16 18:29:30. Can someone explain to me why this hurts so freaking much?! I watched the man who I share his DNA, who may not have been a father but he was my father. Then 7 months or so later have to watch my mother, the woman who brought me into this world, carried my through this world in so many different ways. Who I miss more than life itself. I want to…
It’s been 5 years momma since I watched you take your last breathe. Not a day goes by that you don’t cross my mind. I make sure to touch your urn every single day of my life. Watching you leave the earth so unjustly, with the pain of a thousand knives you left without me.So many things left unsaid, not done, that I struggle with. So many memories have dimmed in my mind as I…
Originally posted 2020-02-29 08:32:10. This is where I am right now. As much as I smile to hide through the pain this is me. I will admit it. It’s like I am almost not even feeling things the way I would normally. Am I depressed? Maybe so. I am not suicidal even though I will admit that after my momma’s passing all I wanted to do was be with her. The moment she passed I…
I started my Friday like any other day. I looked for something to watch, or play in the background as I did my work on my computer. I listen and watch the tv but never really get into what is playing because I am working and my main focus in on my computer. I found something to watch, it was called “Evil Lives Here, Shadows of Death”. I found it on the Discovery channel/app. As…
Originally posted 2020-01-30 09:00:29. I can to relate to this right now. With so many things that have changed in a little time I want to remember the good times but when I do I feel like I am messing with the healing process. I know life goes on. Hell … I am haven’t even gone back to my mothers house since she passed away. I can’t. How do you get past certain things? It…