Triggering Grief

A couple of mornings ago my bff and I went to find strawberries. We found them and a few other goodies.

When we came back my husband wasn’t himself.

It was Luther Vandross’s birthday.

My husband’s father loved Luther Vandross’s music.

For whatever reason it hit him like a ton of bricks and it burst into tears.

He had a really off day.

He hasn’t really grieved since he passed 2 months after we got married.

This year we will have been married 15 years.

If you have read my blog from the beginning you know I never got a chance to meet his father.

There was something that hit him that day.

He added Luther Vandross music to his Amazon music playlist but now it seems he will end up taking it off because he isn’t sure if he can get through the music without breaking down.

He said he did what I normally do which was blasted the music to the point you can’t hear yourself think and just do things to keep busy at the same time.

It worked but I don’t know for how long.

I don’t know how to comfort him. He is able to comfort me when I am feeling down about my mom.

I don’t have anything to say to him. I have one memory of him alive and it was just hearing his voice while I was talking to him on the phone.

Whereas my husband has a bunch of things he can say about my momma.

What do you do? What do you say when you can’t really comfort someone like they can you?

November 4th 2006 he passed away.

It’s weird because once my grandbaby arrived my husband said something about his dad and that his death was the day before our grandbaby arrived and then the next day was my husband’s birthday.

I don’t know what all that is but it is an odd feeling.

It’s almost a helpless feeling.

We all grieve in our own way.

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