My mother and my step father have been a huge part of our lives. They have been there for us throughout my life and the lives of my children multiple times. Yes, I admit that is a parents job. But even as an adult with my own children they were there for us more than I could actually count. I can’t thank them enough.
To the time when they snuck me out of the hospital under the bio-father’s nose and I hid for several months in a friends attic. I could have stayed with them but I was pregnant and needed to stay as calm and stress free as possible. For the sake of fingers lets just say the bio-father/ex when I say “EX” that is the bio-father, absent parent, my abusive ex. Ok, so the “EX” knew where my parents lived. Yes, it would have been extremely dangerous for him to show his face there considering my step father is a deer hunter, hits his mark, don’t get good cell reception, are in the country and well…they love their daughter and grandchildren. Now that being said they aren’t stupid and wouldn’t just hurt him for no reason but if put in a position where they needed to defend me and my two children and themselves then who pain is inevitable. Just like to add one funny thing, my step father can get him a deer while using his bathroom window. I’ll let you figure that out. Gotta love ’em.
Another time myself and my kids ended up in another part of the US far from the sounds of morning crows, wind chimes in the wind, the love of the neighbors you don’t even know. Yes, the south. I had spoken with my mother and told her what happened and her words to me were, “Amy, come home.” And that we did. It didn’t come without its difficulties.
I broke my spine in 2004. I had lost the discs in between my vertebra in my spine and was at risk of being paralyzed. See, back when I shattered my leg/ankle I saw different doctors. One doctor that did a MRI told me that I had degenerative disc disease. Well that is just another form of arthritis. But for me, it was at a much higher rate. I was in my mid to late 20’s and I had the spine of an 80-year-old woman. Because of my heart issues (having had 7 mini-strokes, heart flat-lined 5 times, one stroke and a diagnosis of neuro cardio genic syncope) the surgery required a cardiac team in cause of issues. It required a bit of planning for all involved and the hospital so that all could be present without any other interruptions. The surgery was around 8 hours. I couldn’t do anything at all for the entire month before surgery. No sweeping, washing clothes, cleaning. There was too much at risk. My mother and step-father lived on the other side of town. My mother would come to my house everyday in order to help me do whatever needed to be done. She would take any dirty clothes to her house and wash them. My daughter who was about 8 or 9 years old had to step up and help more than she did before. Any other person might have found this assume but for me it was nerve-racking.
Once the day came to have it…well it meant life may change. Not so fast. I had the surgery and then within a couple of weeks there was an infection in and around the caging. See in order to fix my spine they had to cut me both on my stomach and on my back. Flipping me over in the process of the surgery to make sure my spinal cord, all vertebra were where they needed to be. They had to put bone graft in my spine to regenerate some sort of support between the vertebra. Unfortunately that bone graft went places it wasn’t supposed to go.
Both the surgery from the shattered leg/ankle and my spinal surgery my mother and step father were there. Helping me help myself and my children get back up. To date I have had 18 surgeries, including the ankle/leg, my spinal fusion, 5 laparoscopic, cancer, hysterectomy, and more. I must have corrective surgeries due to some failed medical implantation and live with affects everyday. My mother has been there for just about each one. I can’t thank them enough for all they have done. I love you both more than you know.